Where have I been?

The short answer to my title question is quite simple- I’ve gone nowhere interesting unless you consider the online shopping lane fascinating. The chores and tasks of my life have continued like always; I cook, clean, take care of my kids, drive a lot of places like an Uber, and try to stay on top of the constantly growing laundry piles we create every week. I don’t travel well, and even intending to try new things, I choose the cautious life trajectory I prefer. So, I know, by now, you must be asking; why did you stop writing on your blog? (Do you hear the sarcasm?)

            I had the best writing intentions at the beginning of last year. I wanted to grow my writing portfolio by creating entertaining tidbits about OCD, mental health, and Jesus regularly. But, as the weeks rolled by, I found less and less time for my writing. It was like I fired myself from the job of creating. Maybe I didn’t have any material, or I didn’t feel qualified. All I knew was the desire to blog or create stories had evaporated, and at first, I wasn’t even sad about it. 2023 was full of relationship trials, health struggles, and parenting stresses, convincing me that I no longer had anything important to say. I was grieving the friendship loss of someone dear to me, and I wandered around aimlessly trying to find my peace in it.

            Then, a line from my latest book club read called Becoming Duchess Goldblatt by an anonymous author hooked my attention, convincing me to think about my creation process. The author says, “Writing, I said. I feel like the best version of myself when I’m writing” (p.57). My soul sat up in full attention.  Maybe there was a valid reason why my counselor said writing needed to be the main strategy I utilized to move away from anxiety, and closer to healing. Writing helps to make me a better version of myself because when I write, I am forced to see Christ all around me. I see the ways He’s been with me or how He’s helped me face OCD battles or heck, the normal struggles of every day. Writing is my walking stick, so I plan to lean on it as I hobble through life's many trials. The act of verbalizing all the goodness of God to others in written form forces me to reflect and meditate on how He has sat with me on the dirty floors of my brain. His kindness and goodness need to be my focus amidst the noises of discouragement, so that’s what I plan to write about this coming year, so I hope you’ll stick around and hobble along with me.

Becoming Duchess Goldblatt by Anonymous- Copyright 2020